A long-serving healthcare assistant has reflected on her four decades working at a nursing home in Caterham and said “every day is a blessing”.
For 40 years, Rose Arney has been supporting residents at Tupwood Gate Nursing Home, on Tupwood Lane, ensuring quality of life for those in need of support.
As well as holding the hands of those receiving end of life care, she has also supported others to become well enough to return home or enjoy years of living as independently as possible at the home.
For Rose, it was a profession she fell into for “convenience”, and one she initially intended to be short term-only.
“I was working in an office before I had my Daughter, but it wasn’t fulfilling me. I needed something more.
“A position came up as a Healthcare Assistant at Tupwood Gate, then known as Surrey Hills Clinic, for the night shifts and I thought ‘I’ll give it a go’.
“It suited us as a family because my husband could look after our daughter during the night, and I could be the best mum possible during the day and still manage things like the school runs.
“I certainly didn’t envisage I would be doing the job for 40 years or more but I simply fell in love with it.
“I didn’t particularly like nights because you came in, put the residents to bed and that was it. Whereas during the day, you get them up, you spend time with them and really get to know them. You’re getting the whole picture. When I started day shifts, it really ignited my passion and love for the job. I’ve never looked back.”
Cygnet Group took over the management of Tupwood Gate Nursing Home in 1988 and the nursing home, on Tupwood Lane, is now part of the Cygnet Nursing Homes division.
Rose said she’s seen plenty of development over that time. She also describes how the needs of residents have changed over the last 40 years.
“I’ve seen so many changes, so many different matrons and managers. I’ve enjoyed all of it,” she added.
“When I first started, the residents who came to us were younger, more mobile and able to walk and do things for themselves.
“Over the years people are staying at home a lot longer and they’re not coming into nursing homes until they absolutely need to come in. The needs of the people we support have changed a lot, and we have more residents now who require end of life care.”
Although it can be difficult, Rose admitted one of the most rewarding parts of the job can be supporting somebody during their final days.
“The fact I get to be the person there for somebody at the end of their life, holding their hand when they need it the most, it makes me feel wonderful that I’ve made that difference,” she said.
“Somebody has lived a whole life, perhaps over 100 years, with all their stories and experiences they’ve gained. And it’s you that gets to sit there with them at the end of it. It really is a privilege and something I don’t take for granted.
“Equally, one of the best parts of the job can be when someone comes in for end of life care and the expectation is they’ll be with us for a few months. However, sometimes it happens where you can keep them to start eating and drinking and you see them blossom again.
“It’s really lovely and makes my heart feel happy, especially when they’re well enough to go back home.
“I also like our residents to be presentable so I enjoy supporting them with this. When they come down looking nice, it makes me feel good to think that I’ve helped them and it boosts their self-esteem too.
“It’s such a nice feeling, knowing you’ve helped someone along the way.”
Rose said one of her strongest qualities required for the job is patience, something she prides herself on.
“I’ve got a lot of patience and sometimes, even with our more challenging residents, I can see that they’re not meaning to be. They are just frustrated and you have to coax them round and bring them out of themselves.
“I’m also very caring. When a family member thanks you for being there and supporting their loved one, it makes you feel really good.”
One of the highlights of Rose’s career was in 2011 when Tupwood Gate achieved Gold accreditation with the Gold Standards Framework, followed by platinum accreditation in 2021. The GSF supports and enables front line staff teams to provide a gold standard of care for individuals who are nearing the end-of-life.
“It made us all feel absolutely brilliant,” she said.
“It also shone a light on just how fantastic Tupwood Gate is.
“The work can be challenging and there’s lots of demands on your time. You want every resident to feel they have an equal share of your attention.
“Tupwood is what I call a ‘homely’ home. It’s so relaxed here, you are made to feel welcome, day or night. The entire staff team are so supportive and we go out of our way to help the residents and their families too.
“Sometimes it’s just like living in a hotel because it’s so lovely.
“We have entertainers come in, hairdressers, we go on trips out. I love getting involved.”
Although Rose admitted she sometimes regrets not gaining her full nursing qualification, she said she wouldn’t swap her job for the world.
“Every day is a blessing in my job.
“Even when people do pass away, it’s nice when the families come up to you personally to say thank you. You build a rapport with them, it’s a privilege to be the person looking after their mother, father, husband or wife.
“Those little things, the times when you’re acknowledged for doing a good job, they become the big moments.
“Working in this job, it really makes me appreciate a lot more now. It has made me a better person, I’m definitely more empathetic to the needs of other people.
“I plan to retire in a couple of years but I have a lot more moments to soak in before that happens.”
